Thursday, July 3, 2014

The big toe

I was given a school assignment by my daughter. The assignment was to write a thesis on the big toe. I do hope this brings you some enjoyment. The word "hallux" is the Latin translation of the largest toe.

Hallux

            I am quite the thespian, if I do say so myself. To paraphrase the great William Shakespeare, “A toe by any other name would smell the same.”
            It is unfortunate that my possessor cannot appreciate my merit. I am, after all, the largest attachment to their foul smelling foot. Do they have any regard for my feelings? It is doubtful. They would have some concern, however, if I no longer existed. Their sense of balance would be precarious, at best.
            They fail to even take notice of my presence unless I am wounded by their own carelessness. Then, however, they tend to cast blame on me. How inconsiderate! I have no eyes to see that they left the Lego on the floor, or left a chair leg protruding from under the table. If they would take responsibility for their actions, my tender body would not be wounded quite as frequently. If I am placed on one more of their sharp, plastic blocks, I do believe I will be blemished for life.
            I deserve to be treated with gentleness. I crave a fine pedicure, with a wonderfully scented lotion being rubbed into my delicate skin and beautiful color placed upon my finely shaped nail, so that I can be proudly displayed in my owner’s open toed shoes…those shoes that they refuse to wear because I am hideous in their eyes. Well, if they would care for me as I deserved to be cared for, then they could display me with delight. I am not a vain hallux. No, far from it! I just desire to be cared for as much as they care for the other “more desirable” components of their bodies!

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